Thank You God Chords

Standard (EADGBE)

FI have an apology to Cmake,

 I'm afraid I've made a big Dmmistake,

 I turned my face away from Cadd4You, LCord.

FI was too blind to see the lCight,

 I was too weak to feel your Dmmight,

 I closed my eyes, I couldn't see the Cadd4truth, CLord.

EBut then like Saul on the Damascus Amroad,

EYou sent a messenger to me, and Amso,

 I have Fhad the truth revealed to me,

 Please forgiEmve me all those things I said,

 I'll Fno longer betray you, Lord,

 I will Gpray to you instead.

 And I will say A♯thank you, Fthank you, Cthank you God.

A♯Thank you, Fthank you, Cthank you God.

CThank you God, for fixing the cataracts Gof Sam's mum.

I had no idea but it's suddenly so clear,

 Now I Cfeel such a cynic how could C7I have been so dumb?

FThank you for displaying how praying works,

 A parCticular prayer in a particular church,

DThank you Sam, for the chance to acknowledge this oGmnipotent ophthalmologist.

CThank you God, for fixing the cataracts Gof Sam's mum.

I didn't realise that it was so simple,

 But you've Cshown a great example of just C7how it can be done,

 You Fonly need to pray in a particular spot,

 To a partCicular version of a particular god,

 And if you Dpull that off without a hitch,

 He will Gfix one eye of one middle-class white bitch.

 I Amknow in the past my Fdim7outlook has been limited,

 I Amcouldn't see examples of where lFdim7ife had been divinitive,

 But FI can admit it when the Cevidence is clear,

 As Dclear as Sam's mum's neGw cornea.

That's extremely clear!

Extremely clear!

CThank you God, for fixing the cataracts Gof Sam's mum.

I have to admit that in the past I have been skeptical,

 But CSam described this miracle and C7I am overcome.

 How Ffitting that the sighting of a sight-based intervention,

 Should Copen my eyes to this exciting new dimension.

 It's like Dsomeone put an eye chart on the wall in front of me,

 And the Gtop five letters say I-C-G-O-D.

CThank you Sam, for showing how my point of view has Gbeen so flawed.

I assumed there was no God at all but now I see that's cynical,

 It's Csimply that His interests aren't parC7ticularly broad.

 He's Flargely undiverted by the starving masses,

 Or the Cinequality between the various classes.

 He Dgives out strictly limited passes,

 RedeGemable for surgery or two-for-one glasses.

 I Amfeel so shocking for hisFdim7torically mocking.

 No, your Aminterests are clearly conFdim7fined to the ocular.

 I Fbet given the chance you'd eschCew the divine,

 And Dstart a little business selling Gcontacts online.

CFuck me Sam, what are the odds that of Ghistory's endless parade of gods,

 That the god that you just happen to be taught to believe in is the Cactual one and he C7

digs on healing,

 But Fnot the AIDS-ridden African nations, or the Cvictims of the plague, or the

flood-addled Asians,

 But Dhealthy, privately-insured Australians, with Gcommon and curable corneal degeneration?

 This Amstory of Sam's has but a sFdim7ingle explanation:

 A Amsurgical god who digs on Fdim7magic operations.

 No it Amcouldn't be mistaken attriFdim7bution of causation,

AmBorn of a coincidental Fdim7temporal correlation,

 ExAmacerbated by a general Fdim7lack of education,

AmVis-a-vis physics in Sam's Fdim7parish congregation.

 And it Fcouldn't be that all these pious Cpeople are liars.

 It Fcouldn't be an artifact of Cconfirmation bias.

 A Fproduct of group-think,

 A Cdim7mass delusion,

 An GEmperor's-New-Clothes-style Fdim7fear of exclusion.

 No it's Ammore likely to be an alFdim7l-powerful magician,

 Than the Ammisdiagnosis of the inFdim7itial condition,

 Or Amone of many cases of sponFdim7taneous remission,

 Or a Amrecord-keeping glitch by the Fdim7local physician.

 No, the Fonly explanation for CSam's mum seeing:

 They Fprayed to an all-knowing Csuper-being.

 To the Fomnipresent master of the Cdim7universe,

 And he Gliked the sound of their Fdim7muttered verse.

 So for a Ambit of a change from his Gusual stunt,

 Of being a Fsexist, racist, Emmurderous cunt,

 He Fpopped down to Dandenong and Emjust like that,

FUsed his powers to Cdim7heal the cataracts,

GOf Sam's G♯mum.

 Of ASam's mum.

DThank you God, for fixing the cataracts Aof Sam's mum.

I didn't realise that it was such a simple thing.

 I Dfeel such a ding-a-ling, what an ignorant scum.

GNow I understand how prayer can work,

 A parDticular prayer in a particular church,

 In a partGicular style, with the particular stuff,

 And for parDticular problems that aren't particularly tough,

 And for partGicular people, preferably white,

 And for parDticular senses, preferably sight,

 A partGicular prayer in a particular spot,

 To a parFdim7ticular version of a particular god.

 And if you Aget that right, he just might,

GTake a break from giving babies malaria,

 And Dpop down to your local area,

 To Efix the cataracts Aof your Dmum.

 Hallelujah! A D