Standard (EADGBE)

 Key:

Chords used:

Intro

--------

Verse 1

Hello welcome to the show Thought

 we broke up years ago What's up

I just shit my pants Gambled and

 I lost Good times just blew out

 my knee I've fallen and I

can't get up Oh shit

I think I broke my

 back Where's the wheelchair?

Chorus 1

 I'm old school

 I'm played out

Osteoporosis

glaucoma and neurosis

The vultures circling

 above our balding heads

Verse 2

Second verse the

 same as the first

I forgot the words

 again Railer lost my inhaler

Who's got a smoke for the Caper?

Hold on let me catch my breath

All right I feel better

 now Take it to the bridge

Brdige:

I'll never be Ozzy On

 stage when I'm fifty I'm gonna look

 like Elvis By the time I'm forty

We're already bogus We're already

fading We'll never be The

 Rolling Stones I'm staying home

Chorus 2

C#m--A-G#- x2

Dementia and senility My failing

 muscles atrophy I've lost all

 ability Falling apart

Interlude

E-G#-C#m-B7-A-B-E--

Outro

Blue hair brown teeth

Failing livers defeat

Maybe we will try to pull

 it off For another year