Standard (EADGBE)

 We've been together for so very long

 But now things are changing,

 Oh I wonder what's wrong?

 Seems you don't want me around

 The passion is gone and the flames died down

 I guess I lost a little bit of self-esteem

 That time that you made it with the whole hockey team

 You used to think I was nice

 Now you tell all your friends that I'm the antichrist

Oh, why did you disconnect the brakes on my car?

 That kind of thing is hard to ignore

 Got a funny feeling you don't love me anymore

 I knew that we were having problems when you put those

 piranhas in my bathtub again

 You're still the light of my life

 Oh darling I'm beggin', won't you put down that knife

You know, I even think it's kinda cute the way you poison

 my coffee just a little each day

 I still remember the way that you laughed

 When you pushed me down the elevator shaft

Oh, if you don't mind me asking what's this poisonous cobra

Doing in my underwear drawer?`

 Sometimes I get to thinking You don't love me anymore

You slammed my face down on the barbecue grill

Now my scars are all healing but my heart never will

 You set my house on fire

 You pulled out my chesthairs with an old pair of pliers

Oh, you think I'm ugly and you say I'm cheap, you shaved off

 my eyebrows while I was asleep

 You drilled a hole in my head

 Then you dumped me in a drainage ditch and left me for dead

Oh, you know this really isn't like you at all.

  You never acted this way before

 Honey, something tells me you don't love me anymore

 Oh no no, got a funny feeling You don't love me anymore