There's A Good Reason These Tables Are Numbered Honey. You Just Haven't Thought Of It Yet Chords

Standard (EADGBE)

EmPlease, leave all overcoats, canes and top hats with the doorman

From that moment you'll be out of place and underdressed

Am7I'm Gwrecking this evening already and loving every minute of it

 Ruining this banquet for the mildly inspiring and..B. Em

EmPlease, leave all overcoats, canes andD7 top hats with the doorman

GFrom that moment you'll be out of Am7place and underdressed

 I'm Amwrecking this evening already and Bloving every minute of it

CRuining this banquet for the mildBmly inspiring Baugand...

EmI'm the new cancer, B7never looked better, Emyou can't staGnd itD

 Because you Gsay so under your breath

 You're reaF♯ding B7lips "When did he Bmget all confiCdent?"

CHaven't you Bmheard thatAm7 I'm the new Gcancer?

 Never looked Am7better, and B7you can't stand it

B C B C B

EmNext is a trip to the, the ladies room in vain, and

Am7I bet you just can't keep up with (keep up) these fashionistas, and

GTonight, tonight you are, you areAm7 a whispering campaign

B7I bet to them your name is "Cheap", BI bet to them you look like B7shh...

EmTalk to the mirror, Amoh, choke back tears

 And keep Gtelling yourself that "CI'm a diva!"B Am7

Am7Oh and the smokes in that B7cigarette box on the Ctable,

 They just so Am7happen B7to be Amlaced B7with Am7nitroglyceB7rin

EmI'm the new cancer, B7never looked better, Emyou can't staGnd itD

 Because you Gsay so under your breath

 You're reaF♯ding B7lips "When did he Bmget all confiCdent?"

CHaven't you Bmheard thatAm7 I'm the new Gcancer?

 Never looked Am7better, and B7you can't stand it

Em Am G Em

Am B Em Em

Em Am G Em

Am B Em Em

EmHaven't you heAmard that IG'm the new caEmncer?

 I've Amnever looked beBtter, and yEmou can't stand it

EmHaven't you heAmard that IG'm the new caEmncer?

 I've Amnever looked beBtter, and yEmou can't stand it

 And I Emknow, and I know, it just Amdoesn't feel like

 a night Gout with no one sizing you Emup

 I've never Am7been so surreptiB7tious, so of course

 you'll be disEmtracted when I spike the punch

 And I Emknow, and I know, it just Amdoesn't feel like

 a night Gout with no one sizing you Emup

 I've never Am7been so surreptiB7tious, so of course

 you'll be disEmtracted when I spike the punch

 And I Emknow, and I know, it just Amdoesn't feel like

 a night Gout with no one sizing you Emup

 I've never Am7been so surreptiB7tious, so of course

 you'll be disEmtracted when I spike B7the Empunch