Standard (EADGBE)

A pity she does not exist

 A shame he's not a fag

The only girl I ever loved was

Andrew in drag

There is no hope of love for me

 From here on I'm a stag

The only girl I'll ever love is

Andrew in drag

 Andrew in drag

Andrew in drag

 Andrew in drag

Yeah

I don't know why I even went

 It's really not my bag

Just thought it might be funny to see

Andrew in drag

The moment he walked on the stage

 My tail began to wag

Wag like a little wiener dog for

Andrew in drag

 Andrew in drag

Andrew in drag

 Andrew in drag

Yeah

I've always been a ladies' man

 And I don't have to brag

But I become a momma's boy for

Andrew in drag

I'd sign away my trust fund

 I would even sell the Jag

If I could spend my misspent youth with

Andrew in drag

 Andrew in drag

Andrew in drag

 Andrew in drag

Yeah

So stick him in a dress and

 He's the only boy I'd shag

The only boy I'd anything is

Andrew in drag

I'll never see that girl again

 He did it as a gag

I'll pine away forevermore for

Andrew in drag