Standard (EADGBE)

Where is she

 When the little thing cries?

 She lies in a bed

 With a friend of mine.

But some nights

 She'll run back in fright

 If she picks on a dick

 That's too big for her pride.

Oh! Oh!

Why did I ever go marry her?

I was a child!

 I'm holding the baby,

 She's ran-tanning constantly.

She saw me coming for miles.

She saw me open wide.

(Repeat verse)

Four o'clock

And the key's in the lock.

And she's been on the wink

And she's stinking of drink.

Wakes the kid,

So I put him to sleep,

And she's in there all night,

Doubled over the sink.

Oh! Oh!

Why did I ever go marry her?

I was a child!

I'm holding the baby,

She's ran-tanning constantly.

She saw me coming for miles.

She saw me open wide.

Open wide.