Standard (EADGBE)

 If you offer me pheasant, I'd rather have grouse

 If you put me in a house, I would much prefer a flat

 If you put me in a flat, then I'd rather have a house

 If you set me on a mouse, then I only want a rat

 If you set me on a rat, then I'd rather chase a mouse

The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat

 And there isn't any call for me to shout it

 For he will do as he do do

 And there's no doing anything about it

The Rum Tum Tugger is a terrible bore

When you let me in, then I want to go out

 I'm always on the wrong side of every door

 And as soon as I'm at home, then I'd like to get about

 I like to lie in the bureau drawer

 But I make such a fuss if I can't get out

The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat

 And it isn't any use for you to doubt it

 For he will do as he do do

 And there's no doing anything about it

The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious beast

 My disobliging ways are a matter of habit

 If you offer me fish, then I always want a feast

 When there isn't any fish, then I won't eat rabbit

 If you offer me cream, then I sniff and sneer

 For I only like what I find for myself

 So you'll catch me in it right up to my ears

 If you put it away on the larder shelf

The Rum Tum Tugger is artful and knowing

The Rum Tum Tugger

 Doesn't care for a cuddle

 But I'll leap on your lap in the middle of your sewing

 For there's nothing I enjoy like a horrible muddle

The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat

 And there isn't any need for me to spout it

--

For he will do as he do do

And there's no doing anything

 abow, awow, about it!